Today was my 15th birthday. It started off with some pancakes and a coffee for breakfast. After my belly was full I went to have a shower and got ready for school.
When I got to school everyone wished me a happy birthday which was nice. Harry gave me a bar of Oreo chocolate but there won’t be any left after a few days. At lunch time Sam also gave me a bar of Oreo chocolate. So now I have two.
When school finished we came home and I opened my presents. I got some money, a bag, some clothes and a BCF voucher. I haven’t decided what to buy yet.
When I finished opening my presents I went into the vege garden to see how my plants are going and to see how the chook is going.
When I came upstairs I talked to my Nanna for a little bit and then had a shower because we were going out for dinner at Finlay’s. I had Red Throat Emperor, Daniel had steak and Mum had calamari.
When we finished we sat around the fire for a little bit and then went to the Kalbarri Cafe to get an ice cream. We went to the park to eat our ice creams while playing on the swings. Daniel and I went on the little kid swings and Mum went on the older kid swing. Daniel and I flipped upside down with our legs looped around the chain and got a little bit light headed with all the blood rushing to our heads.
When we got bored we decided it was time to head on home. When we got home we had a shower and laid on the couch for a little bit, until I decided to write on my student blog.
Happy Birthday Lochie! Sounds like you were totally spoiled 😃.
I have separated your sentences into paragraphs for you but, if you read over your story, you will see that every paragraph begins with the same word and you repeat ‘a little bit’ quite a lot. It is good to vary your language to make your stories more interesting. For example you could use – later, later that day, after dinner, before going home and so on. Try and focus on this next week.
Happy Birthday for Yesterday Lochie i hope you had a really great day. First one in the class to turn 15.