Strange events-a short story

We thought we were the only ones who noticed the strange events…

Then we saw the news on the TV…

We decided to keep it secret because we didn’t believe it when it happened… but that secret was not going to last long…

It was a Saturday, Mark and I went down to get some lunch, nothing out of the ordinary happened until we got to the shops. That’s when it happened, we heard a car’s tyres screeching around a corner then we heard gunshots “BANG BANG BANG” Three quick shots went off then we heard the car rev it’s engine…it was coming for us…We were like rabbits in headlights.

Suddenly we were pushed out of the way. This kid saved us. He wasn’t that much older then us.
He yelled “What are you doing? Follow me!”

We did what he said. He led us into the shops, which were empty, and ran around taking stuff from every shelf he could see. We were still shocked at what happened earlier.

He shouted again. “What are you doing? Let’s go!”

He led us to the roof of the shop and looked.

“My God…” Mark said “see why we had to hurry?”

The whole city was in chaos… people screaming, helicopters flying, fire everywhere. Suddenly a helicopter was flying out of control.

“Look!” the kid said.

Suddenly I wished I hadn’t… A person fell out of the helicopter. Then it was spiraling into a building. It scraped against the building, finally hit the ground and sat there.

“Come on” the boy said.

We went down to a tent passed the helicopter where lots of people were gathered. Mark saw his parents and ran to them and same with the other boy. The soldiers pushed everybody into the helicopters. They were safe.

By Nate

4 thoughts on “Strange events-a short story

  1. Nate,

    What a terrific story! Well done. I like that you didn’t try to write too much and tell a big story. Instead you took a snapshot of what was happening and wrote about it. That’s exactly what a narrative is. I’m also pleased you didn’t explain – you left the reader wondering.

    I edited it slightly. A few things for you to note –

    1. Take a new paragraph for each speaker;
    2. I shortened a few of your sentences because short, sharp sentences tend to build tension:
    3. You continually wrote ‘where’ rather than ‘were’.
    Where – where is he?
    Were – were you with her? Where were you?

    Otherwise, great work!

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